THE ICK (revealing my biggest ick)

hello grasshoppers! today's topic is THE ICK, this is the definition of the ick for the ones that are not familiar with the term. Something someone does that is an instant turn-off for you, making you instantly hate the idea of being with them romantically. there's this one thing that idk but i can't get over, this is probably the biggest ick a guy can do, yet i understand how bad it is to think this is an ick. today was the first time i ever said it outloud but a big ick to me is when men show the feeling of excitement or enjoyment ik this sounds terrible bc these are lit natural human emotions but guys i dont know why i cant. examples: a guy singing to his fav song outloud, jumping of excitement (unironically), yelling of excitement, showing physical reactions to winning like for example if he's on a playstation game and wins and proceeds to exclaim words like "YES LET'S GOOO" combine with a body reaction i'll simply leave the room. basically men showing happiness idk if my brain relates this to being inmature?? idk again i understand how this is wrong and i need to work on myself but 😭 also this is a deeper analysis but this might be rooted from something else, since i also find myself getting the ick when i show the same emotions to a man, like i get the ick for myself if someone relates to this pls lmk and if u are studying or a certfied psychologist please psychoanalyze me i want to hear your opinions either way i'l talk to my therapist about it and i'll let you guys know i guesss in the meantime i'll continue to be better ig 🙄 -mariahcareyxoxo side note( im done writting this entry but my friend just told there is def trauma behind this)