DEBATING IF I SHOULD MAKE MYSELF BETTER OR WORSE

hello sexy grasshoppers!! a couple weeks ago i went through a 48 hour heartbreak 😔💔 and this has been the fastest ive gotten over a situation it usually takes up to 1 year 1/2 either way my brain went to the same process and got to THE hardest question of every heartbreak "should i make myself better or worse" this question can be extremely debatable since both sides have their cons and pros so lets make a list!! :D BE BETTER PROS * healing and growing its the best revenge a girl can have * has long lasting effects * gets you better things * makes you feel better in the long run * great comeback * always the victim never the villain BE BETTER CONS * the process hurts * it takes a long time to heal * ups and downs BE WORSE PROS * feels good in the moment * great feeling of rush * a sense of confidence * aesthetic * great songs to post yourself to * builds ego BE WORSE CONS * temporary feeling * not bringing u to ur highest self * no a good comeback * u might end up being the bad guy MY choice everytime so far has been being better BUT the tentation of being worse is DEF there personally i always want to keep my good girl persona bc ive noticed they regret it worse after and bc im actually good girl and the villain aesthetic looks a little too force on me bc ik i cant be the bad guy im 1000% victim aesthetic idc what u have to say ab it i rather be the victim than the bad guy that way i DONT get karma so even if i get hurt ik theres better out there so i dont mind getting hurt at this point if this is coming out as pick me girl IM SO SORRY THATS NOT WHAT I MEAN AT ALL so i hope everyone gets my point!! smhhh🙄 anyways !!! what are ur thoughts idk how to get views on here :p -xoxomariahcarey